In the Bozone

Hello my friends. Thanks for tuning in once again. I'm in the public library in Bozeman, MT. This is a really cool little town where Montana State Uni is located. It hasn't been ravished by tourists yet but still has a slightly trendy yet outdoorsy kind of vibe. I'm staying with a friend of a friend. I rode in yesterday and called my friend Aaron Matto cuz he used to work on a ranch here in MT. I asked him if he still knew anyone here and he said ya, she lives in Bozeman. What luck. It's amazing how warm and welcoming strangers are when you get vouched for by good people. Let's get caught up.

After my flurry of activity in CO I rolled up into WY. I stayed at the KOA in Rock Springs the first night. For those who don't know, KOA is basically corporate camping. Gravel lots, showers, laundry, pool, gift shop, etc. Kind of a repulsing camping experience, especially when you consider who my neighbors were.

Rock Springs, like Vernal, is driven by oil and gas drilling. Every third car I saw was a Halliburton truck. The two guys camping next to me were fat brothers from Kentucky. When I rolled in at around 4pm they were sitting in their American flag chairs drinking Coors Original with several empties on the ground. They were bitching about how hard it is to find work. Here are some of the quotes that came from their campsite:
"We almost had jobs at this one place but they wouldn't hire us cuz my brother's got felonies. It's like, he already payed his fuckin dues so what the fuck."
"Hey, check out that chick. Shes a 3-6-9. 3 Minutus to talk to her, 6 minutes to f__k her, and 9 years in prison."
And my favorite "Well I guess I better brush my teeth and shit like that."

Leaving the next morning for Jackson Hole was refreshing. JH was the first small town I've passed through where I didn't have people to stay with or at least meet up with. I got there early and started scheming a place to stay. The hostel was full and hotel rooms were outrageous. My first thought was to head to the bar, and make friends with the bartender, then ask to camp in his back yard. The pitfall to that plan was that it didn't leave me with an alternative in case I had to ride somewhere else.

My next plan was flawless. I cruised into a river touring agency and offered the guides a case of beer to let me crash in the back of the shop or in one of their backyards. I know plenty of riverguides who would have jumped at this opportunity. In fact I don't think that any riverguide who's worth a damn would have turned down this offer. Alas it proved fruitless. Maybe they were nuns disguised as river guides.

I was kind of bummed that that method didn't pan out but it all turned out great cuz as I was riding to the nearest campground I saw my first ever bull moose grazing down by a river. Then a couple minutes later I saw two buffalo. Then I met a really cool BMW rider out at the campground. So what may have made a cool story turned out to be a cool story.

I spent the next three days hiking around in the Tetons. The peaks there are stunning. They got more snow this winter than they've had in over a decade so my backcountry trekking plans were foiled once more. So instead I just did some really long day hikes, one that landed me at a frozen alpine lake. Definitely went skinny dipping when no one was around. I'll try to upload the video of my shenanigans.

Following the Tetons I road up into Yellowstone. I stopped at the first visitor's center to get weather and trail conditions, wildlife sightings and campground availability. The place I wanted to camp that night hadn't filled yet but was about 30 miles away (it's a big park). I hauled ass over there, not stopping to fill up first. I almost shot myself in the foot on that one cuz when I got there the sign said "Campground Full". I went in anyway and the lady at the desk was able to pull some strings, had her manager do an override in the computer system, and snuck me into a small site in the way back. It was a great place to camp and the neighbors were awesome. I ended up hangin with them by their fire, talkin story and playing Egyptian Rat Screw (which I dominated). It turns out that one of the guys almost took an animation job with Don Bluth, to whom I am somehow related. Small world.

It just went from sunny to gale force winds and hail in a matter of 5 minutes in Bozeman. I hope my bike doesn't blow over. Crap. Holy shit. Bozeman is getting pounded right now. The hail hitting the tin roof of the library sounds like a freight train. People are gathering at the windows to watch this storm. The hail is huge and coming down in sheets. There's no way my bike is still upright. The entire ground outside is a blanket of white.

While in Yellowstone I saw Old Faithful Geyser, The Old Faithful Lodge (an impressive ancient structure built from logs and braun), "The Grand Canyon of Yellowstone", and countless other thermal features. One of my days there I was sort of listlessly riding (which I never do) to get to a trail head and saw some steam as I was coming around a bend. Unconciously my first thought was that it was a factory. But as I rounded the bend I saw that it was of course a vent in the ground releasing steam and not a factory at all. Kind of sad how conditioned we are. I must have really been out of it that day.

Yellowstone was cool but almost too crowded to enjoy. I sat in a line of about 60 cars so every single asshole in the park could stop traffic to take a picture of a buffalo by the side of the road. I stopped and took a picture of the buffalo. But at least I park and hike unlike 90% of park visitors. It's kind of disgusting.

After Yellowstone I headed here. Did a pretty cool hike to a mountain lake yesterday. The only advantage to the switchbacks being covered in snow is that you don't have to feel bad about degrading the mountain side when you cut the trail and just bomb straight up the hill. A couple of times my leg sunk all the way through the snow up to my waist. So I'm here for one more night then off to Glacier, which sources say is the prettiest park in the USA. Can't wait. Love you all and talk to you soon.

Dane

p.s. It's once again sunny in Bozeman.